5/21/08 - Have I mentioned I hate the dentist?

So yesterday, I went to the dentist for a routine checkup. It's been about a year since I had been, and I had noticed a rough spot on one of my teeth I wanted to get checked out so I set it up.

Now, I have to say, I have several strange fears. Holes in clothing for example freaks me out. Spiders terrify me and strings in general bother me quite a bit. But of all of these, my biggest fear is teeth. It's difficult to explain. Some people hate the thought or feel of metal on their own teeth. That only bothers me when someone else does it. I can rub a fork along my own teeth all day long. Some people are simply disgusted by dirty or dead teeth. For me, it was difficult to even type that line, in fact, I got the chills before it was finished. At the end of the day, I can do anything to my teeth, but no one else can get near them, and no one should ever have to touch anyone's teeth but their own.

Because of this, my trips to the dentist are horrible. I'm nervous from the time I walk in the door until I walk back out after the appointment. Several trips ago, I found that holding a wash rag in my hands helps, although my hands are sore from squeezing by the end of the visit. Lucky for me, my teeth were actually pretty clean, so she didn't have to scrape (typing that makes me cringe) very much. She did use a chocolate flavored paste to polish my teeth so that was a positive in the trip, it tasted great.

The bad news is that I need a filling that will be completed in about 6 months when I have to go back from my next cleaning. I've already signed up for the gas because it does help a little. The last time I had work done on my teeth, I got the gas, but I still had plenty of anxiety during the procedure. In fact, I had everything going for me, they had ESPN on the television, I had my mp3 player blaring music in my ears, and I was sucking in laughing gas like it was going out of style. On top of that, they were pumping the max amount of gas to my nose that their system allowed. Still, I was cringing, squeezing the rags and shaking through the whole thing.

I don't even want to think what this next one is going to be like because they don't have cable and they only run...get this...video of other patients who had really bad teeth. So they show before and after shots of some really bad teeth. Also, I should mention that most places have pretty pictures of like the beach, or relaxing type scenes hanging on the wall. Not at this place, they've got all sorts of teeth advertisements showing what your teeth will look like before and after using their product. I'm just hoping that I can stay focused on the gas enough to virtually put me unconcious through the whole thing.


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